When I met him I wanted to get married and have kids. His mother wanted the same for him and pushed him to do the same.
However she always got in his way. She wanted to use my bf as her personal piggy bank to fund her home renovations, make investments to secure her own future, vacations etc.. which made it hard for him to focus on us. She never really taught her son to save and invest in himself as a mother should, instead she was more worried about her own needs and wants. She would make him spend frivolously on her siblings etc. At one point he even told me that his mother wanted to buy a bigger house using his money before we even met. She even sat me down one day and told me that when we get married she expects an allowance from us.
Unfortunately our relationship didn’t work out because of all the burdens placed on him. He felt like he was stretched too thin and couldn’t provide for us in the way he wanted to.
Before I leave I just want to write a text to his mother explaining this to her and ask her to back off a little so his next relationship could actually work out. I want to explain to her a mother’s role is to be selfless not to be selfish.
Is this a bad idea?
TLDR: My (33f) partners (33m) mother gets in his way. We are breaking up but I want to send a text to his mother before I exit to let her know that she’s a disservice to her son. Is this appropriate?