I’m 21f and I just got married and moved to another country. I am an introvert and today I noticed that after the call with my old friend from childhood i was feeling overwhelmed and remembered that it happened all the time after our last calls. I felt ackward in this call and took out random topics out of nowhere, just to fill the void, and asked her many times to tell me stuff. I also felt it was too long but i didn’t say anything and kept adding topics because i didn’t know how to tell her, so it ended up lasting 2 hours.
My husband came to say hi, and after the call said i act different around my friends and i act like another person, (like i was afraid of judgement??) this girl and I, we have knowing each other nearly all our life and she is much more extroverted than me and we don’t really have many things in common anymore, but i apparently I am the same person around ALL my old friends (both in person and at the phone).
I have a new penpal friend that i made after getting married and i don’t act different with her, i think, and my husband agrees. She just got married at 23 and i feel like we have the same interests and more things in common, so I am my true self with her.
I would like to change and be myself with everyone, as I really dislike my “old friend behavior” and i hate the overwhelming feeling i get after our calls. What do you think i can do? Do you have any advice? Why do I act like this?