pls lmk if I’m being dramatic:)
I have a friend that I wld consider I was really close to we used to talk way more often she wld call sometimes. I would call sometimes too we would text and tell each other things. We just used to be a lot closer. I’m 21F and we have been friends since we were 16 and we started living together recently. Then I would call her and she would never pick up, she would be on the phone with our other friend and I would suggest maybe add me to the call so we could all talk together and she never did. I joked about it cause that’s what we are like I made a joke like oh guys stop “bullying me haha”. Everyone in our friendship group has made jokes like that. I would see she would be on the phone to people but just stopped picking up my calls. So I stopped calling, I stopped texting. This is back in January. She hasn’t once tried to call me and we don’t really text anymore. It hurts my feelings.
I also kind of feel like I don’t have much value to the group. This is gonna sound really silly but we had been planning a group trip and I was fully involved in helping plan and then I sent a message saying hey guys I don’t I can go anymore cause I wanna save up and focus on trying to get an art residency. I expressed how much I feel I would enjoy and benefit from it and only one person acknowledged it everyone else ignored and continued planning.
Another minor thing but still hurt is that we did a little friend quiz like “best style or funniest and most likely to go to jail etc” not one person voted for me for anything. Makes me feel so useless and unloved and I know I’m just sensitive so I cant really say anything about it but I really haven’t been feeling valued by my friends much. It’s made me really resent them. I’m aware of my avoident tendencies and pull back HARD when I sense others are pulling away from me. Like I said earlier with my friend that never picked up. I did keep trying even when she wasn’t reciprocating but after a while I just gave up. Yes I have other friends and my boyfriend but this was meant to my closest friend group. I Iive with some of them now and I don’t want to talk to them or hang out at all I can’t even bare to be around them anymore because I feel so separate.