my boyfriend (of about 4 months) came to sleep over after he worked the night shift at his job. i didn’t know he was coming over, but he has a key and will sleep here when he doesn’t feel like driving home after work. so he had said he wasn’t originally planning on coming over but then decided to once he got off work (and i was asleep). he got over at about 3am and i was already asleep. when we woke up the next day, he commented on the t-shirt i was sleeping in. granted it was this big baggy t-shirt i had gotten from my ex of a previous (not serious) relationship. i didn’t want him to think that it was something more than it was so i said “it’s just from home” to which he probed a little further and i said “yes it’s from an ex”. i assured him that to me, it was truly just a t-shirt that was comfy for sleeping and didn’t mean anything more than that. I left for work at 9am while he usually stays and sleeps longer. when i was getting dressed i had thrown the t-shirt in my hamper located in my closet. after i had been at work, he texted me to let me know he threw away the t-shirt i was sleeping in. i was taken aback for a moment because i kind of thought he was kidding. when i got home, i asked him about the shirt comment to which he told me that he actually threw it away. i checked my trash can and it wasn’t there. he said he threw it away on his way out to get a coffee today. i was started to get frustrated at him for this and he kept saying how if it was truly just a sleeping t-shirt, it shouldn’t be that big of a deal. i brought up how he didn’t even ask me to get rid of it, or stop wearing it before taking it out of my hamper and throwing it out. he said he didn’t think it mattered that he needed my permission and that since i was upset he threw it out, that it obviously meant more to me than being “just a sleep shirt”. when i tried to explain how it’s not anger from losing the shirt but anger that he took it upon himself to throw it out, without first asking me to get rid of it, he kept saying that if it was really just a shirt it shouldn’t mean that much. i feel like im some ways i just don’t like the lake of respect for my things? or maybe the loss of having a say in what happens to my things? i really don’t know how to feel! i’m just looking for some advice about where to go from here.