So I have a lot going on here in terms of relationships (and in therapy for it and it has been very helpful!) Pretty much there’s a long line of failed relationships in my family (some abusive ones long line of divorce) has left me feeling not very confident in my relationship abilities. My therapist said I have a fear of engulfment in which I fear becoming overly attached to my partner or losing my single identity. I had never heard of this theory so was wondering if anyone else has?
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Yes. It’s more commonly referred to as dismissive avoidant in my experience and it’s definitely a thing, although dismissive avoidant includes some other issues as well. Other terms to google can include counter dependence and a lot of people who feel this way resonate with the concept of emotional neglect as well. There’s an attachment theory subreddit as well as dismissive avoidant subreddit as well if you want to check those out but I don’t really recommend the general attachment theory sub.
Just learning that I have a fear of engulfment so thanks twin!
Never knew what to call it before now.
I’m not really in the position to give any advice but if it at all helps… you are not alone!
I’m 30 and the most serious relationship I’ve been in was for 6 months in college. I’m very self conscious about it because I know it’s a red flag 🙁