Ok this is a really weird post but basically I always feel like really guilty afterward masturbating which is awful but now I feel awful whilst doing it too which is fucking annoying.
Like afterwards I quite literally want to die like I feel so disgusted in myself, that doesn’t stop me from doing it tho. But like now I feel guilty whilst doing it. Like please tell me why i’m trying to find out what the meaning of life is whilst I have vibrator inside of me. Like what the fuck 😭
Like i’m being so serious right now like an hour ago I was fucking myself and I just started feeling so suicidal and I was just like thinking what the point of anything? You know what I mean? Like I already know i’m suicidal but please lord let me forget about that whilst i’m trying to cum oh my goddd.
Ya so advice please? I’m more annoyed about feeling bad afterwards because that’s literally the worst feeling bad during isn’t too bad because it’s easier to ignore any weird ass thoughts but afterwards like it’s so bad. It’s bad to the point that I don’t masturbate for weeks/months even though i’m horny because I know i’ll feel guilty. I just wanna do it when i’m horny without feeling guilty pls help lmao
I’m 18F btw if it’s important!