After covid finished I decided it was about time I changed my life for the better, I’ve been able to improve my hygiene alot and also my productivity but when I was attempting to build social skills, there was so much contradicting advice, some people said you should just be yourself and other people said that you should follow what popular people do, so I followed the second option and tried to be more like the people in my school that I thought were cool, turns out that their types of personality didn’t suit me too well but by the time I had realised that I had already completely forgot who I was before, so after about 2 years of confusion I think I’ve recovered back to an ok state and I feel like myself again but but I might just he trying to convince myself that is the case I dunno, but if I have managed to get my personality back again it’s also a bad thing caus I really hate my own personality, I never say anything really interesting and I’m always stressing about about how uncharismatic and unfunny I can be, and when I’m not stressing about that, I’m stressing about the fact that I can’t stop stressing about my own faults. so the problem is, I feel unsatisfied with who I am, but I feel like if I try to improve my social skills again, therefore changing my personality, the same shit will happen again and I’ll be stuck in a shitty identity crisis for 2 years again.
Bro I rewrote so much of this that it probaly makes no sense, but that’s basically my state of mind, I try to put everything together but it never makes sense to me
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This is difficult to read as it’s just one long run-on sentence