So me, the female, am wondering if this is all just some mind game or if I truly am a selfish asshole. We’ve been together since July 2023 so we’re almost at a year. At the beginning it was so perfect. Like nothing I’ve ever felt before and the sex was to die for. Long story short, I put images in his head of past relationships for some reason I don’t know nor do I really recall making such vivid comments but I’m easily distracted and have a terrible memory so I have no facts to stand on that I didn’t. This has slowly but surely ruined our relationship. I’ve fucked up every chance I have to make it up to him and he feels second rate he says. Idk I can’t do anything right it feels. I always miss my que or chance to make a big impact on our relationship in a good way. I’ve damaged his mental health so much he hasn’t even been taking care of himself anymore. Says he can’t even look in the mirror at himself anymore because he is so haunted by this and the fact I did nothing to help. He gets very cruel and vicious when we fight (never physical, he would never do that) but severely crushes me emotionally and mentaly every time. I still love him deeply and just want us to work through it. I welcome any opinions that anyone may have on the subject. Thank you 😊
Tl;dr
I fucked up at the beginning of the relationship and he has relentlessly come after me about it multiple times but I also ignored the ways I could have helpped unintentionally