I 28/F have been with my partner 28/M for 12 going on 13 years. He’s my only REAL relationship experience as we got together when we were 15/16. I came from a very troubled household so in a lot of ways he has been my savior growing up. However in 2021 things started to get difficult, I put it on myself because both of my parents had passed away that year and I was in a very dark place. I started drinking a lot and stopped taking of myself (taking my medications) and I ended up pregnant. I knew I was very emotional and going through some things so I tried my hardest not to be clingy but he just stopped caring, I remember begging him to not to leave me in the house big,pregnant and depressed but it never worked. After we had the baby, I found out that he was distant cause he had cheated and once again I made excuse cause I knew my pregnancy was difficult, and I was very sick as well as grieving, I just felt like I wasn’t a good partner so I attempted to forgive(really I was so alone, just lost all the family I had and the one I built with the man I loved was crumbling before my eyes, I just wanted things to stay the same) . So fast forward a year and things are still rocky. We argued 2 months ago and he let me know that he has another child (basically he has been cheating the whole 12 years and has decided that he knows he wants us now) I tried to explain how that’s such a big betrayal of trust, and literally broke my heart but somehow I was told that I was being selfish and him having a baby just out in the world doesn’t effect me. Now he has involved family who are telling me I’m being selfish for wanting to leave. ( I should mention that at the start of 2021 we moved across country and I do not have any friends or family at all) maybe I am being selfish but it’s impossible to believe he could love me. Now it feels like he’s begging me to check back in to the relationship but I can’t look at him without being disgusted. Am I wrong for planning to leave?
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TLDR
After 12 years with my partner he told me he had a child sometime during our relationship but that’s all. Now he’s calling me selfish because I told him it changes everything.