I can’t orgasm, ever.

I’m 23F and I’ve been pretty sexually active in my adolescent and adult life. I’ve had several partners, some long term and some one night stands, but I’ve never been able to orgasm. Even when I try to do it on myself, I can’t. I’ve always had confidence issues in the bedroom, always wanting it to be pitch black and never wanted to get completely naked, but with my current boyfriend I’m very comfortable and confident. He has made me feel “close” to an orgasm (at least I think), but then it’s like I have this immediate mind block where my thoughts start racing and I am no longer focused on the pleasure. Even when I do feel super close and don’t get that mind block, nothing happens. I’ve been with guys who have made me squirt a lot but I know that’s not the same as an orgasm. I feel like my body is broken and nothing helps. I’ve tried sex toys, different positions, literally nothing works.