Confused Once Again

My hook-up and me have been going off and on multiple times for the last year. Something is weirding me out and idk if this is normal. But his penis feels like jelly and shorter and then grows. It doesn’t hit the spot like I want it to anymore. He claims that he doesn’t get hard in a condom easily. But when we used one in the past it took him roughly 30 seconds to cum, and he claimed I was too tight. What is going on!?!