My husband and I have been married for 2 years and are struggling financially. He recently let me know he’s in $45k in debt from CC and loans. I obviously freaked out and suggested bankruptcy but he cannot do that because he works in the financial industry and would lose his licenses. I have some debt as well, but not anywhere near that much.
I suggested that we pay off my debt and he just focus on paying down his debt so I can focus on our rent and car payment. This freaked him out because he didnt like the fact that I was dividing finances, but I felt like it was generous to take rent off his plate of financial responsibility. In actuality, I think he feels like I’m going to leave him and I can’t say that hasn’t crossed my mind. We’ve been in therapy and I’m trying so hard to be fair. He said that if I do leave him he will be sure to leave me with half of his debt cause he doesn’t trust me to pay off my debt and stay with him. I could move back in with my parents alone for 3 months, be out of debt and buy a small house or condo and be out of this. But he really wants me to be “in it” with him, and I just don’t want to be in that terrible financial situation with him.
I am afraid, but also I know I’m not happy in my marriage. I feel trapped. I feel like leave is the obvious answer but I feel afraid to, because what other financial surprises are out there that I don’t know about?