For context, I’ve always been an introvert with social anxiety and I’ve never had any super close friends. After going through a serious spell of depression a while back, I’ve noticed that I’m going beyond introverted and becoming anti-people. Recently it has been pretty common for me to not talk to or be around anyone, not even my immediate family, unless during meals, and even then I’m pretty quiet. I noticed myself getting really annoyed at the few friends I do have for just doing things like asking to play video games or go out for the day. I get really annoyed at anybody that tries to socialize without me instigating it. I’m no longer an introvert, I just hate people, period. I was pretty content with this way of living but there were a few things that were bothering me.
1: I don’t want to waste my youth. Even though I don’t like people or doing things, I feel like I’m wasting my childhood away by being a social recluse and not doing anything. I don’t want to look back on my youth and remember all the time I spent by myself.
2: I really do want good friends. I constantly see people having a blast with friends doing things and enjoying their lives making friends and even though I don’t like people, I want that.
I’d like to become more extroverted and more of a people person, or at least less antisocial. I don’t know what to do, any advice?