My bf and I have been together about 3 years, much of this long distance as we are in separate states for school. We are both 22. One of my friends (21) has been with her bf (20) for about 6 months and ever since they got together I have a hard time comparing my boyfriend to hers. More specifically, her bf tends to show love through gift giving while mine does not. My bf and I have a had a few conversations in which I’ve expressed that gift giving is one of the ways I feel loved and show love the most, yet he was raised differently and finds this stuff materialistic and not important, especially since his love language leans more towards quality time. While I don’t expect him to get me expensive gifts or flowers daily by any means, in our 3 years he has given me one gift (which I treasure dearly). Meanwhile my friend’s bf is always bringing her flowers, plushies, and other gifts like the soaps she uses and little accessories. How can I come to terms with the fact that I will never receive this type of attention from my partner? Is this something I should just accept or is it worth it to continue having conversation after conversation when it seems to change nothing? Is this something worth ending our relationship over? I know comparison is the thief of joy but it is hard when it feels like there is something missing in my relationship that other people are getting plenty of. He makes me feel loved in other ways, however this is something that I’ve been having a hard time with lately.
TLDR; bf doesn’t understand my love language and I can’t stop comparing our relationship to one where this need is being met.