I am 40f and was divorced 1.5 years ago. I was married for most of my adult life. Because I have never dated around, I don’t know what is “normal” when it comes to relationships or if my expectations are too high. I have been dating a nice guy for about a year who is also divorced.
For example, when my ex and I first were together 20 years ago, it felt so natural and safe and familiar, like we immediately connected on an intellectual/humor level (we did not connect physically so much). With my current boyfriend, I don’t have that type of connection at all, but our physical chemistry is great. Also, though I know many facts about my boyfriend, I don’t feel like I truly *know* him, and I don’t feel like he really knows me. But we enjoy spending time together and we are both nice people who enjoy being nice to one another.
I know there is no “magic” formula so I am just wondering if I should just look on the bright side and not worry so much about our incompatibilities. Advice?
tl;dr I don’t know if I have too high expectations for boyfriend or if I should ignore my doubts and concentrate on the positive
1 comment
I guess it depends on what the goal is for this relationship. If the goal is just to spend time and keep each other company, then it sounds like you have that already.
Really *knowing* someone only comes with time and shared experiences…like if you have a crisis and he comes through for you, then you *know* he has your back. So I guess it sounds like you’re on the right track either way…