Hi everyone
as the title says I feel like a POS for wanting to leave my partner.
since the beginning of our relationship 5 years ago he was already drinking a lot. and this has not changed over time.
As background I was raised by an alcoholic mother who hit me whenever she wanted.
my husband is a great guy. but I feel that alcohol is his great love.
we rarely do activities because he prefers to stay and drink at home. At our wedding he bought me a $4 ring before the ceremony because he forgot to buy me one and spent all his money on alcohol. etc.
Last year I was planning to leave him, this year around April. unfortunately for me in February he had an epileptic seizure. Basically, the doctor explained to me that he drank so much the day before that it shocked his brain.
After the seizure he promised that he would stop drinking. He even stopped for a few weeks without touching even one glass. (He would drink 3 bottles of 1.14 liters of vodka per week before)
But as time passed, he started drinking slowly again, one glass, and two and now he's back to the way he was before.
Before the seizure, we talked about his drinking, but it always end up with him saying that he does not have a problem with alcohol and that he drinks so life can be more fun. And after the seizure i told him that if he started drinking like that again i would leave him.
And today here we are. I feel like he made his choice. But i feel bad for wanting to leave. i am already dealing with my mother's drinking, now i have my husband.
Do anybody have a piece of advice for me? Thanks for reading me.
Tl;Dr husbands drinks too much. I want to leave but i feel bad. Need advice pn how to deal with it