There’s been a couple of occasions where this has happened, I don’t put myself out there much because I have social anxiety and moments like these remind me why I became socially avoidant in the first place.
For example I was talking to a guy who I thought I vibed with until I ended up saying something which made him suddenly change in his energy. I told him I was interested in getting a dumb phone because smart phones were a bane to have and for some reason he acted like I said something offensive.
The only reason why I thought maybe this was the case was because he came from an unprivileged background living in squats and guardianships and maybe talking about buying materialistic things like this was out of touch of me.
The other more recent situation was when I left the club with a guy and I was chatting with him whilst waiting for an uber, he said he owned a pub and I asked him the name of it and after he told me he said he was just gonna go piss somewhere, I waited for a good few minutes the uber arrived and told me he cancelled the trip so he ran off and left me basically.
Again I felt like I didn’t say anything out there to make someone do something like this, the only thing I thought maybe me asking what pub he owned was too personal- I wasn’t planning on even visiting I was just making small talk as we waited. Or maybe my aura was just off putting and he changed his mind.
These sort of interactions really do me a lot of damage because I have no real answer to why people get put off by me and it’s not like they would tell me why either. I have a big fear of rejection and abandonment too and things like this put me off of trying to overcome that and believe that I’m worthy.
I often overthink in conversations and these two were some of the only occasions where I could express my stream of consciousness without doing that but now I think I should just continue to overthink what to say.