So my boyfriend and I both got together in 2020 and we both had kinda low wage jobs. In 2022 he got a good job as a mechanic in a factory and since then he's got promotion after promotion. He said he currently have over $15,000 in the bank.
Idk Im a vet tech and I definitely don't have that money. I have maybe $3,000 right now altogether.
HE won't tell me exactly how much he makes but he'll put entire checks into savings and I just don't understand.
I pay all my bills on my own. Car insurance health insurance credit cards Mt credit score is above 700.for whatever reason I always pay for our vacations or road trips…
HE never talks about finances with me and we've lived together for at least 2 years.
Does he not trust me? What do I do?
For example in 2021 we went to Florida and I don't think he paid for anything. But at that point I thought he just didn't have money. He promised to pay me back and it kinda turned into " oh well I buy you lunch sometimes"
I was like eh whatever. He's a good partner but he never was really in touch emotionally or deeply with me. Idk. Not very romantic. But he was always all over me. I never liked it much but whatever.
As we got older I noticed he never pays me back for anything but he always wants me to pay him back.
We went to Las Vegas in 2023 and I handled all the planning alone. He did end up giving me some money but it was nothing compared to the total I paid.
Now today, 2 things. 1) I lost my watch, he offered to buy me a new one but not until next paycheck? I said why wait it's on sale now. He's like no Mt moneys in my savings I don't want to rack up credit card debt…? The watch is legit $65+shipping.
2) we… Well.. I have been planning a vacation for us and I'm really out of money..I paid 2800$ for the flight and hotel and a rental for some days. Everytime I ask him for money it's an excuse. But yet he wants to go out to eat like 3 times a week.
I know he has money I've seen his bank. He openly talks about how much money he has. Yet he never wants to spend it on me… He'll buy a ton of stuff he doesn't need/use too. We have a spare bedroom full of his shit he never used a second time 3d printer. Camping stuff. Guitars. Etc
But when I adopted a dog he was worried I was taking up space… I wanted a dog for years and he always agreed until the day we went to pick the dog up, suddenly he was having a full panic attack saying he wasn't ready. But he was with me every step of the way adopting this dog…
Whatever I've had the dog since April and I've done everything for the dog alone.
Idk I love him but lately I feel like he only likes me for physical attraction. I don't want sex anymore. Like at all. I feel no sexual need for anyone or anything this last year. He's a good partner. He may be a little autistic ? Like he doesn't tell me much. Idk I have no friends. I feel so shitty if I was to break up with him because we get along well but lately I just feel so stressed out and I don't know why he's acting like this …
Any advice ?
TL;DR
My boyfriend makes a ton of money but never pays me back or helps me out. Only ever wants to spend money on himself on bullshit and go out to eat every other day. I've lost any physical need for sex altogether. I feel like he's always been distant but it's worse and worse. Help what do I do?