So we’ve been dating for a year and a half. He’s 27 and I’m 22. We have not had a good sex life, at least on my part.
The problems with our sex life involve him not spending enough time on foreplay or me. I’m never turned on enough before we have sex. Sometimes it even hurts because I’m not ready. Sex is always rushed. These are the main issues with our sex life.
We’ve talked about it countless times and he always blames being in a bad mental health state. I don’t understand that at all. I deal with mental health issues myself so I get it but this I don’t.
I get having your mental health affect maybe being able to perform and maintain erections. Or maybe even your sex drive. But not caring or putting in effort for your partners pleasure, I don’t get. If he wasn’t caring about his our pleasure I would maybe understand but it’s only my pleasure that’s getting neglected.
He’s also not always had mental health issues throughout our relationship. He’s had moments were his mental health has been good, yet he can’t explain why he hasn’t cared about my pleasure.
What do you make of this? Am I lacking compassion? Or is he bullshitting? I’ve never once stopped supporting him during his mental health episodes but I’m being neglected.