TLDR: I've finally realized love is feeling peaceful rather than "butterflies", I want to hear about other people's experience with this and advice on keeping that feeling.
I (F26) have not dated that much in the past, I was so focused on university and graduate school. But I have date 3 men in the past 7 years and I really thought I loved them. I had all the signs we are taught to recognize as being in love, "the butterflies", the additional adrenaline when meeting them, etc…
Until about a month ago I broke up with the third one (M35), entirely based on the fact that the futures we wanted for ourselves really couldn't align. I normally stay single for about a year between relationships, to have time to learn from them, and the mistakes I made during those relationships.
This time was different, 2 weeks after that breakup I went to have dinner with a man (M27), with my intentions being nothing more than frienship, that held about 15 minutes.
His kindness, his eyes, his smile, the way he cared about others, about me, his positive outlook on life, his ambition, the way he can do both jokes and serious topics seamlessly, the way he cares about sharing his culture with me, and understanding mine, the way he speaks about others in the most respectful way regardless of who they are, the way he never fails to check up on me throughout the day, and let me know if he's not near his phone for an extended period of time.
I can't over state how much he's everything I've ever prayed for, and how grateful I am to have met him.
It might really sound cliche, but it did happen when I expected it the least, and I am so so so grateful.
For the first time in 26 years, it wasn't the butterflies that I felt, but absolute inner peace, a certitude that he felt like home, and that he would not just be a friend.
We've met again since and speak every day, and that feeling has only amplified.
I had no idea love was actually a warm and peaceful feeling.
And I would love to hear all of your experiences with this as well !
Thank you in advance for your input !
Edit: Spelling