In summary, M49 with partner F46. Great sex life, but after first orgasm I lose all sensitivity in my penis. Not an erection problem – I have no issues getting a second erection within minutes of orgasm – just a sensitivity problem. It takes hours for sensitivity to come back, but often after only ten minutes my partner will want to have sex again, so we will, but I can hardly feel anything at all (it's literally like the nerves are all numbed) and as a result my lack of 2nd orgasm is affecting her self esteem (twice in an hour is what her friends tell her their partners do, and is her experience with previous partners too).
It's not that I can't orgasm – a very tight grip, fast handjob will do it – it's that I have so little feeling after that first time it takes that kind of tight grip to feel anything at all. I honestly don't mind as long as she's enjoying it but she thinks there's something wrong with her that she can't make me orgasm again even though I've explained why.
Rarely masturbate (to rule out "death grip") and everything is "normal" and great up until that first orgasm. Is there anything I can do, or take, so I keep that sensitivity after orgasm? Thanks