For what seems like an eternity now (in realistic terms 3-4 years), I’ve had this sense that I am in a way over the top react YouTuber in nearly every aspect of my life and I’m rarely ever in control of my emotions in social like scenarios. It’s gotten insanely annoying where I genuinely can’t have a conversation with someone without randomly blurting out crap they don’t need to know and I never actually want to say but it comes out anyway. Anytime Im with family or one specific friend I will quite literally speak for what feels like hours and I hate it; it makes me feel awful that I’m clogging up the air in the room with endless babble. I do sometimes wish people would tell me to shut up because then at least my brain knows to shut up. I even do it when I’m on my own, I know speaking to yourself can be helpful (sometimes) but on other occasions I start babbling like there’s a camera following me around. I have tried so hard to shut myself up, force myself to stay quiet but one conversation later I’m babbling again.
Sorry it’s long, babbling again