Hey, im just asking for informed interpretations of this.
It was close de 2 am when i finally worked up myself to tell her to consider a relationship with me, we were talking alone in a discord call.
​
I asked her and she said something a long the lines of:
“We cant because we are both busy in university and stuff”
This is a weird responce, its kinda of hinting at something in the future but idk.
​
Maybe she just out right rejected me and wasth honest bout it idk.
please, tell me what you think.
48 comments
She’s not interested.
She’s not into you cabrón. Keep your head up loved one.
Yeah, she’s not interested. University is not a deterrent.
Props for mustering up the courage to ask 👍Otherwise you would’ve wasted much more time than this
Just making excuses.
She was trying to let you down easy.
That was a rejection, bro.
I think making desperate pleas of intention is a terrible romantic move, puts pressure on someone, and generally fails just like you did.
If you like someone, ask them out for a drink. If they say yes, go out and have drinks and look for positive signs they’re into you and keep doing that until the dates turn into something.
Making declarations will get you nowhere, fast. She rejected you, move on.
Hey there buddy,
focus on you, you need you right now, to pat yourself and tell yourself you did your best.
What other people do, is not related to you, its mostly related to them, their inner life.
They may chose to give you details or they may not, in some time that will not be important.
What is important is to understand this is not a possibility right now. And that that is okey, it is not personal.
Do not be hard on yourself or take it personally,
Find something to look forward to, a hobby project. To keep your mind from ruminating and reliving events.
She needs to come to you with that. No exceptions.
I think she is worried that we one is in a serious relationship, one should be available and she is nervous that she cannot commit with her schedule?! Sounds like an ok response but maybe during a date, just ask her what she wants the relationship to look like?!
She is not interested.
Move on, do not waste time.
She’s not interseted. Move on. If a girl really likes you, she’ll find a way to spend time with you. Even if it’s just for an hour between classes or a meet up for dinner at Chipotle. You can’t keep them away.
Take it at face value. And act accordingly. Don’t wish or hope. The answer is no.
No future hints it was a nice way to say no.
She’s not into you… That’s just a nice way of telling you
I wouldn’t take It as a hint to something being possible inthe future. I think she’s being clear that something is not possible now.
Date other people. Have fun. Pave the road for a really good, fun future. With or without her
Damn,bro She probably is lying just to not hurt your feelings but who knows
She’s not interested. Don’t waste anymore time on a discord relationship. Download tinder or bumble find some girls on campus/close by and go from there
Drop it and go for someone else
I am guessing its rejection cuz I had my ex who was super busy with work and college, but still she would text me/call me from work, from her home, even she used to text me from class!! Doesnt matter if they are busy, if they really like you they will make time for you!!
So sorry that happened to you, its not easy!! Hit the gym, booze!! Currently in same boat, I am trying to hit the gym everyday just to get her out of my head!! Mine didn’t work because of long distance, separate countries!! Man i used to have a day of on weekends, and we used to eat food, movie, bed, sex and repeat!! but she moved out back to home country, was a good time! but i guess it is what it is
She said no.
She’s not interested.
She’s not interested, but probably cares about you enough that she doesn’t wanna hurt your feelings. She might have thought the explanation she gave you would hurt less than “I’m not interested just because” you know?
Thank you all for awnsering and helping.
Moving on for me is hard. Ive lost many beutiful things in my life and is just sad to lose another (she was really something), and shes one of the few women that i felt something towards.
Eventually this will fade out into the paradoxes of my mind, ill keep working on my projects, myself, and gym. but that need, noise and void will never dissapear i guess.
Ive never felt a woman love or touch, and im a socialble guy, is not like im recluse or anything.
I have a great life and i do the self improvement thing, but that need, you know, that anguish (from various things, not only women) it never goes away.
Thank you all, for poiting what my dumb sorry ass coulth guess.
As far as I can tell, and from experience, anything that is not an straight “yes”, is to be considered a “no” until proven otherwise, said proof being an straight “yes”.
In short: she’s not interested but gave you an indirect answer (She said “we can’t”) for whatever reasons she may have. Up to, an including being an attention-seeker and wants to keep you “in her orbit”.
If she wanted a relationship or anything to do with you she would’ve told you.
Next time never ask for a relationship. It just puts you in a bad spot. Make things happen
She’s focused on school. Aren’t you?
It was a nice rejection. She doesn’t like you in that way and won’t in the future. Don’t make things awkward and just be friends. If you can’t be just friends than slowly distance yourself but still remain friendly.
She is more than likely not interested. If it makes you feel better, she will probably fall for a guy who doesn’t like her as much as you do. So, in the long run, it is her loss. You didn’t do anything wrong. Look for someone else.
i’m all for communication not just interpreting something as something else because you never know. While this does seem like she’s not interested, it won’t hurt to just straight up ask her “Does this mean you’d consider a relationship later on or should i move on?”
It’s not a weird or confusing response at all. It’s a flat rejection. A girl who is interested in you will be pretty obvious about it.
Dude she’s letting you down nicely.
We. Cant. That’s it. That’s all. She said it plain and simple. Proceed accordingly. No maybe if or maybe when. We. Can’t.
Not sure if this is what happened with you but if it were me: If someone told me *at 2am* they wanted a relationship with me, I’d probably assume they wanted a booty call but didn’t want to say that outright or thought I wouldn’t have sex without some promise of committing. I get being nervous but probably best to have that kind of discussion during the day so she knows your intentions aren’t just about sex
Always let the woman define the relationship first
That’s a weird excuse. Many relationships start at the university level. I think she was just surprised by it and didn’t know how to respond.
Honestly a rejection is as clean as it gets. I feel like looking into it like she’s prying for you to jump in wouldn’t be the truth.
A girl who wants a thing with you wouldn’t risk giving you up over that. Thats just how I see it
She’s not interested and thought of an excuse to avoid saying outright she doesn’t like you. That means now and in the future btw. It sucks, but just move on man. Not worth waiting until you’re done with college.
Maybe she was just saying that she doesn’t have time/energy for a relationship right now, or maybe she wasn’t interested and found a soft way to say it. Either way, I’d say move on, don’t wait around
That always makes things tricky. You can be way more successful with women if you don’t tell them your intentions. You should wait for her to ask you the “what are we” question. Otherwise, they are likely to abandon you. One word that comes up when reading information on relationships is “mystery”.
She dont want you big dawg 🤝
It’s a no
I was told that engineers are a special kind of person. OK, they actually said engineers are a special kind of crazy, but that isn’t very polite. I’ve dated few and, I have to say, they weren’t wrong. Not crazy in any malevolent way, but I found their brains are definitely very very logic based. Makes total sense based on the career choice, but ironically found they were often also extremely disorganized and impulsive. My ex bf was a civil engineer. Made over 200k a year, had plenty of money for a single guy, but would have his cable shut off because he forgot to pay the bill, then wait a week to call to find out that he forgot to pay the bill. I would ask him why he didn’t just set up auto pay, but he’d just shrug and say he didn’t know. Dated a fluid engineer, very similar traits. Smart, very logical, but forgetful, impulsive etc.
Not saying this is you, but it’s definitely a fairly well known stereotype and might be a reason she turned you down, idk. I chose to ignore those who told me to stay away from engineers. Kinda wish I’d listened lol
Something I’ve come to find is there isn’t really ever a legitimate thing in the way of dating someone (for the majority of people) you actually are interested in. “Life’s too busy right now”, “schools in the way” etc…. if someone truly wants to be with you, they’ll throw all excuses out the window and try. That being said, this isn’t true for everyone, but does seem to apply to the majority of people. There are always people who aren’t within the typical norm. She could have insecurities of her own or trauma from relationships in the past holding her back and what not… but I would say given she gave you the “university” out, that she isn’t interested in furthering your relationship romantically. I’m sorry it went that way, it takes a lot to ask someone out and be vulnerable like that. Regardless of the outcome, I think asking was a smart move. Why waste time with someone who doesn’t want to invest in you? In the long run, wasting time with someone who doesn’t want to be with you is just keeping you from a potential partner. Good on you for asking! Keep it up. (:
She’s open for business just not to you.
She said ‘we can’t’ which means ‘no’ most usually
Move on. Keep your eyes open for women who might be pursuing you, and trying their best to be subtle. Be curious about the world, talk to strangers, and don’t put anyone on a pedestal. Humans tend to be turned off by those who appear to be trying too hard. I know this game sucks, but thousands of years of evolution is hard to unwind.
Find a university club that isn’t a sausage fest, but doesn’t suck. I really liked the sailing club. About 7/10 students were women. Good times. I met the love of my life 10 years later with a local hiking club. I am glad that we were both available for each other.
maybe she does not want to hurt your feeling by saying No ,SO he said like this