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I can’t relate to the needy part but I can say this… I used to struggle with eye contact unless I felt super comfortable around someone. Roughly 6 years ago, I started delibrately practicing eye contact. Now, in TYPICAL situations, I have little trouble with eye contact. Breaking eye contact is now more of a habit only so that I don’t make the other person uncomfortable. It didn’t take 6 years to get to this point either.