Hi everyone! So I (22f) got dumped by my now ex V (22m) about three weeks ago. I have been so heartbroken and am only recently been functioning better and living life.
A few days after we broke up, my previous ex H (also 22m) reached out to me. He didn’t know we broke up and thought we were still together and had an experience in the army that made him want to reach out and apologize for hurting me in case he didn’t have the chance.
He was very toxic and we were very on/off. We started dating when we were 18 and broke up for the final time when we were both about to be 20. It was my first relationship and I was very attached and he was very immature.
It took me so long to get over him. I was heartbroken over this kid. He wanted to apologize for the way he treated me and hoped our paths would cross again someday.
Well, since I am single and a mess, I’ve been talking to him as a distraction and to boost my ego a bit lol. Well, it has backfired. Because now I feel all my old feelings coming back for him.
I don’t think he wants a relationship since he is away for the army and I think he just wanted to talk again. I’ve been talking about V to him and saying how V treated me right and the way H should have. H recognizes that he was not a great boyfriend but says he’s changed in the past couple years.
I don’t know what to do. I feel like logically I should forget about both of them. V was a great boyfriend but he doesn’t want me anymore. H was a bad boyfriend but we also have both grown and changed a lot. But we do have a past where he hurt me emotionally a lot and I don’t want to keep getting broken by boys I’ve done nothing but love.
But now I really want to keep talking to him. Is it really my old feelings coming back or am I just desperate for attention after V leaving, who I thought was my soulmate?
TL;DR: got dumped and an old ex who used to be toxic reached out. should i forget about them both?
2 comments
Forget about what you *want* and consider what is *smart*. What *logical* thing should you do? You said it yourself, cut off both exes. There’s no reason to keep in contact with either of them because with V you are freshly broken up so you won’t heal and with H you’re feeling romantic when you know you can’t be together with him either. Do that.
You need to stay single and focus on taking care of YOU for a change.
While you’re at it, you need to figure out why you tolerate men who aren’t good for you.