I (F) need tips for buying a dildo for the first time.

8 comments

1. Unless someone’s an asshole they’re not gonna pay attention to you while you’re buying stuff. People buy condoms all the time and have awkward convos while they wait for the Walmart employees to open the case. It’s just part of being an adult.

   You may get better results to the other two questions if you post somewhere where you know you’ll be getting female only feedback.

2. I suggest not a big one, like 6 inches max, for a start.
   But first: have you tryed with fingers?

3. I’m sure you can also buy online with discreet packaging. Unless you are concerned about someone within the house getting nosy about your package.

   As for size, shape, ect, it would seem to me sort of a personal preference. Not being a dildo owner, I can’t be super helpful I guess. There are plenty of resources out there though that talk through different styles and review different models. Maybe decide if.you are.looming for internal or external stimulation ( or both) and go from there. Good luck!

4. People who work in adult stores don’t give a damn what you’re going to use their products for and with whom. They can be really good resources though. I found my favorite lube because a worker told me to buy it instead of what I had planned on. Still using that stuff over a decade later.

   Some stores have testers. Not to use, obviously. 😆 But it gives you a chance to get a feel for the texture. I’d probably go on the smaller side for a first one.

5. > They wouldn’t really know that it is for solo play right?

   To be fair, does it matter any?

   I mean, the sensible conclusion from the situation that a woman goes into a store to purchase a toy meant to please women is that…someone is going have that toy in them – probably the woman who purchases them.

   Does it really matter in that mental image if you hold that toy in your hand, or if someone else is holding it?

   And…does it say anything at all about if there is someone with you in bed while you hold on to it?

   You worry too much. Of course you can go to a store that caters to the needs of lovers and purchase a toy for some self-love. It doesn’t really matter if you are going to use it on your own, or with a partner. You still want, you know, something that you actually look forward to trying to have in you.

   And that leads me to a point I try to make when this kind of question pups up;

   The absolutely most important thing is that you find a toy that you look at and feel sincerely curious about what it’s like to have it in you. Or, if you attack it from the other side of the fence, that you at very least don’t feel repulsed by the whole idea just by seeing the toy.

   Size wise, it kind of comes with the concept that most toys are somewhat similar in size. There are totally smaller ones AND larger ones, but the majority of toys stay within a size bracket that has a mild correspondence to penises. At least when it comes to width. Go ahead and look at some numbers, and you’ll notice that a lot of them stick to a general theme.

   Length-wise, there are a few things worth considering. The first is the obvious one, that if it’s a vibrator that has some controlling buttons, you obviously want those buttons to be accessible on the outside while you experience the sensations it causes. Which means that it doesn’t hurt any that the toy reaches further in than you can comfortably have it, because you are not going to have all of it in you anyway. And it kind of needs to be long enough to reach all the way in, for you to be able to use it to poke around and explore yourself.

   If you want to try a suction cup toy, it *can* matter some what length it is, if you want to try to sit down on the toy. One that reaches too far in is less comfortable if you can never relax when you sit on it. But again, if you are on your back, it’s actually rather convenient that it’s longer than it has to be. Besides, you don’t know anything about your own anatomy – you pretty much need to find out how deep you are, to know how long a toy that is just perfect for you.

   Don’t go with the really gigantic ones, pick a size that is more generic and stays within the common-theme size bracket.

   Remember that a vibrating staff *can be used with the vibrations turned off*. In case you find something with a shape that you are curios about, but are unsure about vibrations. You can keep the vibration capability as a later surprise for yourself.

   Look for a toy that has rechargeable batteries and one of those magnetic-attached chargers, in case you love to take a bath, and think that is a time for some self-exploration.

   No matter how good you are with your natural wetness, also buy some lube. (but read up on which lube you should get, it differs depending on the material in the toy!)

   I guess that kind of sums up your first free questions. Is there anything else you wonder about so far?

6. I there are already some good advices.

   If you’re nervous you can also wear a mask 🙂

7. Whatever kind you decide to buy, I urge you to do some research about materials beforehand! Medical grade silicone is probably your best bet. Just wanted to point this out because the first time I bought one I was mesmerized by one of those “real feel” things that swear they feel like skin. Those things can actually chemically burn your vagina! Had to throw mine out after just one use.

8. Amazon sells sex toys in case you don’t want to go to the store.

   Look online for suggestions on a first time dildo. Don’t get anything over 7 inches. 6 inches is probably just fine.

   When you go to the store you’ll probably find that there’s a lady working behind the counter. If so you can ask them which ones are good.