I’m in my mid-30’s (female) and a few years ago my sex drive sky rocketed. At first, I thought it was me just being weirdly horny, but then I read that women can hit their peak sex drive between the age of 27-45 years old.
Then, I kept reading and it confirmed what we all kind of know – that men hit their sex drive peak in their 20’s.
WTF. Why? Why don’t we hit our sex drive peaks at the same time? Maybe this post would be better in another thread, but I’m not sure where. I tried to find the answer online myself for this difference in ages, but couldn’t.
I’m happily married and would never cheat, but my sex drive has been crazy and my husband isn’t sharing my enthusiasm for the activity like he used to and I hate it. This has pretty much become a ‘need’ like eating and sleeping and not having someone to share it with is more frustrating than anything. This seems more like a stupid biological/hormonal thing and I’m not sure if there’s anything I can even do about it…
A part of me just wanted to share with someone and hope that I’m not alone. Another part of me just wanted to vent frustration over the stupidity of biology… like, are middle-aged women supposed to be going after younger men because our drives match up?!
6 comments
The dirty 30s are no joke. You’re certainly not alone, as it’s common enough to be a meme. Bummer your husband isn’t seeing this as a golden opportunity and taking full advantage.
I don’t have any sage advice, I guess just enjoy yourself and don’t give up on your husband!
Maybe your husband should get his testosterone level checked. Mine was low, got testosterone injections and now I’m like a teenager again.
I’ve read in some articles that the peak they are talking about is not biological. It’s simply that a woman’s kids are older, her stress level is lower, and she’s used to her partner. It’s reflective of earlier days, so I wouldn’t put a lot of faith in it. All lives and peaks are different.
Yes I’ve heard that a lot too. It might have to do with hormone levels is what I think lol
The male sex drive in a healthy man is always much, much higher than women as testosterone is the primary hormone relating to sex drive. Women do have a lot of sex drive too but it’s not even close to the same level.
The male sex drive peak in your twenties is due to an absolute overabundance of testosterone. However, your sex drive as a man in your 30s, 40s and 50s is still higher than that of an average woman. To be honest I don’t think women quite get the level of the male sex drive – we’re literally eyeing up chicks all day long, thinking of sucking some random chicks tits we saw two seconds ago or finger blasting the waitress who just walked past – it’s insanity and although the brute desire is slightly more when you’re in your early 20s, it really doesn’t slow down that much. We’re biologically programmed to want to inseminate women at all times. Obviously this is something all guys know but society deems inappropriate so nobody really talks about it.
The fact that you’re husband isn’t as interested in sex is unfortunately another element of biology. If you put another hot woman in there with him, he’d respond, but men simply get bored of screwing the same chick for years – it becomes dull. Again, society doesn’t want us to admit this but it is the truth. I don’t know what the solution is in your situation – maybe have a some threesomes with your husband, buy a vibrator….or get slammed by someone.
I’m a guy so it’s a lil different, but my drive was low until I found something new I really liked… Now it’s through the roof.
Perhaps some exploration would help?